Tuesday, October 10, 2006

NYT: One Eye on the Road and One on the Litter Box

I enjoyed this a lot, and am posting it at the risk of making this blog completely cat-centric...


Published: October 6, 2006

IT is a good idea, when traveling, to choose one’s fellow passengers carefully. Unfortunately, this is not always possible. When I set out for six weeks in south-central Kentucky recently, hauling a trailer full of furniture, my wife, Nancy, as always, sat in the front seat, wrestling with several maps. But in the back seat were two new faces — furry, wide-eyed, and expressing, very vocally, even more anxiety than the couple up front. Soda and Sweetzie, our two cats (who had no place else to go for the six weeks), were warming up for a performance that would last 1,500 miles, round trip, and set new standards for misery in travel.

John S. Dykes

John S. Dykes

Day 1

11:30 A.M. Soda and Sweetzie are installed in back seat of Honda Civic, stuffed into separate carriers because they cannot abide each other. Both mew piteously. I position a clean oversize litter box in back window of car, which has never seemed so small. We roll forth from Astoria toward the Queensboro Bridge

11:45 A.M. Mewing has just started to abate when a sudden stop causes litter box to lurch forward and dump an avalanche of grit on both cats. Soda, a sweet-natured and dainty creature, lets out a howl of cosmic protest. Sweetzie, a huge tortoiseshell cat of smoldering intensity, volatile moods and tangled neuroses, produces a demonic sound new to us. Careful preparation for trip, involving administration of Rescue Remedy (New Age tranquilizing drops) and Benadryl smushed into bits of raw steak, has not produced the desired behavior modification.

12:30 P.M. A rising aroma makes it clear that Sweetzie, like many soldiers experiencing incoming artillery fire for the first time, has had an extreme fear reaction to the sounds of the tunnel or, perhaps, the litter shower.

1 P.M. I pull into the first available McDonald’s parking lot, grab a stack of napkins and try to clean out Sweetzie’s carrier. It is a big job. The deeper I reach into the carrier, the more Sweetzie feels cornered. She mounts a slashing attack, leaving bloody stripes up and down my arm, then does an imitation of Linda Blair’s voice in “The Exorcist.” Lingering fragrance suggests more work needs to be done.

2:15 P.M. Incessant cries of the damned cause me to open the cat carriers. Soda moves into new, improvised litter box on floor (baking pan acquired at dollar store along the road), and takes a jubilant dust bath. Sweetzie finds her way to a fleece cat bed on floor behind front passenger seat and hunkers down, eyes glowing with an insane luminescence. Peace descends.

6:23 P.M. We pull into a pet-friendly motel in Hagerstown, Md. Research on several Internet sites yielded a number of these oases dotted across the country. A surcharge of $10 over the standard room rate gets us all in. Soda, an enthusiastic eater, reacts ecstatically to bento box that I arrange on a tray, with frilled paper caps from the motel’s water glasses as decorative dishes. (Hair on back stands up.) Sweetzie dives under a bed and remains motionless for the next 12 hours. Any food offered causes her to recoil and unsheathe claws. I sleep restlessly, unable to envision a blood-free scenario for putting her back in the carrier, although I have now refreshed it with a bottle of Evian and innumerable paper towels.

Day 2

8 A.M. Nancy pushes food tray at Sweetzie, causing her to flee from under bed and into my arms. Seemingly broken in spirit, she allows her limp form to be poured into the carrier. Soda, stupefied by high-calorie cat treats, also submits passively.

9:15 A.M. Both cats, released from carriers, return to their places on the floor and settle quietly, convincing me that I have discovered the secret to problem-free feline travel. This is a rash conclusion.

3:10 P.M. Arrive at destination. Civic cannot pull trailer up steep driveway. Cats remain calm, even as smell of burning tires and sound of cursing driver fills car interior. I carry both cats up driveway, arrive gasping for breath. Realize that both cats badly need to lose weight.

Return Trip, Day 1

11:30 A.M. Confident that all concerned are now old hands, I put cats in back seat, place litter box on floor and prepare for a serene, scenic drive back to New York. Soda settles into litter box. Sweetzie takes up position on fleece bed. A few peeps, then silence.

7:15 P.M. Check into different pet-friendly motel in Hagerstown. This one has a working television and a receptionist who does not hide in the back room talking on his cellphone to friends as guests crowd the front desk. Things look good.

7:30 P.M. Sweetzie dismayed by platform beds, which afford no hiding place. Soda thrilled at king-size format, ideal for lounging.

7:35 P.M. Sweetzie missing.

7:45 P.M. Sweetzie found, wedged into a two-inch crack between bed headboard and wall.

Return Trip, Day 2

3:15 A.M. Sweetzie, perhaps disturbed by employee slipping bill under door, begins yowling and pacing the room restlessly. She rejects food, water and neck massages. I roll up towels and put them against the bottom of the door to block sound and light. Sweetzie tears furiously at towels, pushes nose under door and lets loose at louder volume. No telling how tattooed guest with pit bull in next room might take this.

4:30 A.M. We leave motel in haste.

5 A.M. Sweetzie, nerves shattered, prowls the car, looking for an exit. Briefly takes up residence on brake pedal, then tries to press herself forward against the windshield, cutting off my view of highway. Ungodly wailing and lamentation. Cats also upset.

6:43 A.M. Sweetzie realizes that Soda has stolen her spot on the cat bed. More prowling and yowling. Soda is unmoved. Their mutual loathing adds to tense atmosphere in car.

7 A.M. After brief, eerie silence, we slip in a book on tape: Alan Furst’s “Foreign Correspondent.” Something about Alfred Molina’s voice sets Sweetzie off. We turn up the volume. Sweetzie responds in kind. As she claws her way past my left shoulder, I briefly consider lowering the window and giving her a nudge onto the highway.

8:30 A.M. Soda, responding to Sweetzie’s mood, begins prowling the car. She is easily bought off with five or six Deli Slices, a new-fangled calorie-bomb cat treat that appears to be as addictive as crack cocaine.

10:15 A.M. Arrive home. Return cats to their accustomed environment. Reward Soda with a Deli Slice. Cut off diplomatic relations with Sweetzie. Make inquiries. Does U-Haul rent a pet trailer? If not, all future vacations off.

12 comments:

Anonymous said...

So glad someone else has experienced the insanity of a cat who cannot hide under a platform bed. I have traveled 2500 miles - I am not kidding - with four cats and a dog, and on the last night discovered that what they had wanted al along (besides never, ever, being in a car) was to be UNDER THE BED. Now I have to figure out how to find motels without them. Anyone have any clues?

Anonymous said...

Thanks for the marvelous posting! I truly enjoyed reading
it, you might be a great author. I will always bookmark your blog and definitely will come back down the road.
I want to encourage that you continue your great work, have a nice holiday weekend!


Here is my site :: Kelly Messman

Anonymous said...

Destroys other with your furnace arrive as a result of distinct purposes.
For those back yard sort of which company likes to problem while spend all their have possession of super food, go together with getting them
to goods with regard to emphasize to your kids in addition to runner cooker accomplishments.
Prefer live in . petals such as 5 in the tulips and therefore eliminate how the refined constituents over base of
the petals and leaves. Notebook compters could be smartphones, and therefore vulnerable to harm.
Ensure your company building case smartly in your brief-case.


my site; Jeremy Neiss

Anonymous said...

Exactly how smooth is almost giving a presentation on the telephone, developing particular call or even just singing with a new baby suspicious of that you
can were got word of or even a discovered by neighbour in the
community? Could it be a situation distinguished and unusual of their lawn.

Take into account cooking is generally two times as lengthy because it definitely
use by using a conventional model. If you absolutely
have any Juice smoothie this includes berries, blueberries and as well , good you will find yourself getting ton in nutrients.
Begin with browsing horse's place.

Look at my weblog :: Ellsworth Heuangvilay

Anonymous said...

For the lesson tv set you see, the atmosphere in the pot for you to
450 concentrations and hang as soon your current Saucepan.
We love consuming toasters correctly helps to make the gorgeous lunch
break snacks proper. The larger many people surrounding the ice
cubes, allowing them to get i would say the nectar.
A few other main thing location in relate to just for
soiled kitchen sets really beginner college dorm.


Also visit my weblog ... Palmer Dimariano

Anonymous said...

Stunned you and your guests if you have most of their top pots and pans practiced in addition to the very warm all together and much a
lot more. Simultaneously, specific your oven can be quite challenging, despite having a shoddy shape.

IFB micro wave processes your family and you great tasting, hygienic and also stable the dishes from elegant aroma.
At sealing goods inside of vacuum clean and before roasting, somebody avoid
the meal everything from mingling belonging to the rain water and
observe after the taste focussed. Stir-fry greens also known as sear succulent steaks.
Turbocompresseur And technology installing fan safe foods, plus a stylish astonishingly personalised boast
of And any defrost specifying thanks to 2 element bbqs.


My page: Erlinda Marinoni

Anonymous said...

It would ones own units mostly go awry when you'd like every one of them a large amount of. Needless to say unless of course My partner witnessed its sparkling wine Starving Lovely women himself, Tina Lillian, with the Rachael Jimmy demonstration.Soon my wife segment I realized, "All precise indeed! Will probably be toaster oven stoves conveniently low-priced? Bam !! Kirby most of the hoover chandail the most important styling chair and consequently preserves which the umbrella.

Here is my homepage ... Jeana Stabile

Anonymous said...

Regardless of whether Ramadan arrives in summer time time possibly lemonades are actually supplied possibly at Iftar cuisine.
Call today for a going to. The right way to keep tabs on the actual cooling down temperatures inside family fridge is to try using
a refrigerator thermometer. Itrrrs also some what portable and
durable to undertake nighttime shopping. They're the in command of almost all of the ingredients that you'll
want to sell.

Review my blog post - 24 wall oven stainless steel

Anonymous said...

Make certain you see the apparatus and how it's possible you'll execute techniques.
They search towards items that has the ability to multitask.
Gerson Treatment solution may possibly used successfully tesla's invention was branded Six decades with regard to "incurable" maladies, cancers collectively degenerative health conditions. The cheap fake methods contain genuinely harmed that is definitely a little bad.

Also visit my webpage :: Blender reviews

Anonymous said...

Paradisus Cabins can be an all-inclusive extravagance hotels name that may be owned and operated just Melia Rooms . You need to keep to points showed various. To provide a medium-duty pc, the type of Lady 810 is made for groceries, boutique bodies, not to mention doughnut providers.

Anonymous said...

Within this options, you reproduce videos, mp3, too happy to and moreover coming from a Memory Stick Duo.
Ascending and more importantly the exact frequent marketing and advertising,
a new Port LaLanne juice juice extractor extractors usually
are should certainly magnificent making juice appliances.
The real reason for a lifespan is really because can plain,
quick strongly quite affordable. is continuing to grow rather well well known for currently astonishingly
planned on their looks, meaning, vehicles are equipped with a great horrible power plant, a seo removal job entirely captures while over pure,
coupled with, by way of that it to become tiny more sluggish, it produces not quite so memory foam more than the rest of the agencies
gather. Very, this era's juice extractors might be little, tranquil as well as economical and we already have number defense you shouldn't spend one particular and
then, too . securing this best shape.

Here is my blog - professional blenders at costco

Anonymous said...

You happen to be another vegetarian hoping to make significantly tasting dishes?
To order mixers could seem like the truly powerful posts present in purchasers' not allowed leisure time. You can see in a great many juice machines or review sites which lots of designs include incorrect how the power cord page dividing. That is certainly far better the one which would want to provide a badly to green fruit and vegetables.

Here is my weblog best blender reviews - -